Friday, May 16, 2008

the polite potty mouth

A conversation I had this morning...

Jake: "Waffle! WAFFLE WAFFLE! WAAAAAAAAAAFFLE!"
Me: "Waffle coming up... here you go."
Jake: "F#$k you"
Me: "Huh? What did you say?"
Jake: "F#$k you F#$k you F#$k you!"
Me: "um"
Me: 10 seconds later: "oooooh, you're saying thank you. Say THANK YOU Jake. Like this, THHHHAAANK you."
Jake: F#$k yoooou."

Apparently Jake has somehow, all of a sudden, decided to exchange his reasonably well pronounced version of "thank you" with a certain expletive. OUT OF NO WHERE. This is especially annoying since Jonathan & I don't use that kind of language. Anymore. We use those words on occasion, but certainly not in that context and NEVER around the kiddos.
F#$K.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

if you give a mom a muffin

I don't know who originally wrote this, but I thought it too relatable not to share.

If you give a mom a muffin,
She'll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
She'll pour herself some.
Her three-year-old will spill the coffee.
She'll wipe it up.
Wiping the floor, she'll find dirty socks.
She'll remember she has to do laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer,
She'll trip over boots and bump into the freezer.
Bumping into the freezer will remind her
she has to plan for supper.
She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She'll look for her cookbook
("101 Things TO Do With a Pound of Hamburger").
The cookbook is setting under a pile of mail.
She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow.
She will look for her checkbook.
The checkbook is in her purse
that is being dumped out by her two-year-old.
She'll smell something funny.
She'll change the two-year-old's diaper.
While she is changing the diaper, the phone will ring.
Her five-year-old will answer and hang up.
She'll remember she wants to phone a friend for coffee.
Thinking of coffee will remind her
that she was going to have a cup.
And chances are... If she has a cup of coffee,
Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

My Mothers Day


was spent doing this...
it's moments like this that make it all worth it.

Friday, May 9, 2008

quite the little performer



okay... so he didn't sing, dance or do much of anything other than shake a maraca and suck on his fingers. STILL, I think this is the best thing EVER. I had no idea we'd be going to these school performance things so soon. I still can't even believe he actually stood there. I thought for sure he'd go into a fit of yelling "WAFFLE" over and over (as he does) and then run out of the church. Who is this child?

How to get a coat on a hopped up toddler



After the performance, Jake discovered the table of cookies and sugar water otherwise known as "punch"... AND so did all his classmates. Chaos ensued.